We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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