Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
