I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
