no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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