If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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