i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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