I'm going to jail i love you
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
