I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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