I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Randomize
