I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
