why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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