hell yes lets make some ravioli
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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