I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
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