I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
