WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize