So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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