My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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