Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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