Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
