All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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