went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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