normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize