The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
