period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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