There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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