if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
