All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
