sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
