we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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