I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
