Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Randomize
