Where are you?
In a non slutty way
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
