margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Someone shit on the floor
I think I am morally bankrupt
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize