how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
