Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
