Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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