Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
