i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
