my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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