so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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