Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
