Don't you send me to vm
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
