Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
