Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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