Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
