Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
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