And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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