yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
