That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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