their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
